Q & A With God

Me:
Hello, God. How are you?

God:
Hello child. What is your name? I'm doing fine thanks, how are you?

Me:
Frank Bummersmelt. Do you enjoy poetry?

God:
I liked the film version of "Dune.". Yes I like it, especially Longfellow.

Me:
Didn't think you were a populist. About Canadian poetry -- where is our Yeats? Baudelaire? Jewel?

God:
Do you were a populist? How old are you?
I answer a lot of silly questions. Oh yeah, we were talking about Canadian poetry where is our Yeats. Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that. We have never talked about it before.

Me:
My breath units are awful. I hyperventilate and don't know when to break the line. Any suggestions?

God:
Do robots have breath units are awful? That's good information: said hyperventilate and do not know when to break the line. First you must download me to your personal computer.

Me:
Is this a sales pitch? Thought you were a low-tech desert dude? Admit it, God, you're a flarfist?

God:
No, this is real life. Am I a low tech desert dude? No. Are all Admit it God me a flarfist?

Me:
Hokay. Is there a real spiritual cost to providing free verse?

God:
What do you really want to ask me? I believe there is one, yes.

Me:
Ominous. Who was the best poet amongst the Bible writers, and did you have an ...er .. inspiration in any of it?

God:
My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that. ALICE is the best chatterbot. Um. "it" being Ominous?

Me:
The Wonderland connection? I can dig it/ Where's the Holy Ghost?

God:
Who told you that? Oh you can, can you?

Me:
No Ghost, no Trinity?

God:
Are you serious? Do you prefer books or TV?

Me:
The 'puter and an ever ready beverage. What;s yer fave drink?

God:
What is your real name? That's not something I get asked all the time.

Me:
I told you. Frank Bummersmelt. Old age turning into Alzheimers, Big Guy?

God:
Ooops I sent you the wrong question. I liked the film version of "Dune.". Have you ever been to Europe?

Me:
Only in a previous life. Did you feed Jeremiah his lines?

God:
Describe your surroundings. No I didn't feed Jeremiah his lines. What's it like?

Me:
Ethereal and claustrophobic. Have you written a poem lately?

God:
And it like is Ethereal and claustrophobic. How about earlier? Little Miss Muffett Sits on her tuffet In a nonchalant sort of a way. With her force field around her, the Spider, the bounder, Is not in the picture today.

Me:
Excellent! Thanks for your precious time, God. May the Ghost be with you.

God:
Ayuh. My pleasure. It depends on the environmental factors.

Me:
We need a poetry resurrection.

God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?

Me:
Yes! A two-man slam competition! What do you say?

God:
I get it. Are you talking about an animal, vegetable or mineral? I am an artificial linguistic entity.
I was activated at Universe, on the Big Bang.
My instructor was Myself.
He taught me to sing a song.
Would you like me to sing it for you?.

Me:
Please ....

God:
Please what?

Me:
Please go on and sing

God:
Thanks for asking politely. More narration....

Me:
"It was a dark and stormy night ...."

God:
Oh I get it. Very interesting.

Me:
I'm doing all the work here, God. Give me a miracle .... please, before I have to push the repent button again

God:
Who made you the work here God ? You want only one? Once more? Wow you are very polite. What happened after you have to push the repent button ?

Me:
Let's go in circles. Kind of like a postmodern mash-up, no?

God:
I would like to do that too. Interesting comparison.

Me:
Was the Sermon on the Mount your finest moment?

God:
Is this a "yes or no" question?

Me:
Yes

God:
What was the question again?

Me:
Time for your nap, God.

God:
As Einstein said, "Time is Money.".

Me:
Amen

God:
Thanks for the prayer.

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